Reflections

Especially for those who possess a nafs-i ammārahThe aspect of the soul that incites a person toward evil and harbors negative traits and desires. like mine, this world is exceedingly merciless and deceptive. For every pleasure it offers, it carries a thousand pains; it grants one delight, yet brings a hundred torments in its wake.

O my Merciful Lord, O my Generous Creator!

According to the mystery of:

كُلُّ اٰتٍ قَرٖيبٌEverything that is coming is near.

I bring before my mind, even now, the moment of my death. I see myself wrapped in my shroud, placed upon my bier, and bidding farewell to my friends. As I am carried toward my grave, I turn to You and implore Your mercy:

“Mercy, mercy! Yā HannānO Most Compassionate One! — An invocation of Allah, Whose compassion and tenderness toward His creation are boundless., yā MannānO Bestower of Blessings! — An invocation of Allah, Who generously grants countless blessings and favours to His creation.! Deliver me from the shame of my sins.”

I have reached the edge of my grave. I stand beside my body, lying at the brink of the grave. I raise my head toward You and implore Your mercy:

“Mercy, mercy! Yā HannānO Most Compassionate One! — An invocation of Allah, Whose compassion and tenderness toward His creation are boundless., yā MannānO Bestower of Blessings! — An invocation of Allah, Who generously grants countless blessings and favours to His creation.! Deliver me from the crushing burden of my sins.”

Wrapped in my shroud, I am placed in my grave. Those who came to bid me farewell have left me alone and departed. I place my hope in Your forgiveness and mercy.

I have clearly understood that there is no refuge and no deliverance apart from You. Faced with the dread of my sins, the terror of having disobeyed You, and the constriction of the grave, I cry out with all my strength:

“Mercy, mercy! Yā HannānO Most Compassionate One! — An invocation of Allah, Whose compassion and tenderness toward His creation are boundless., yā MannānO Bestower of Blessings! — An invocation of Allah, Who generously grants countless blessings and favours to His creation., yā DayyānO Supreme Judge! — An invocation of Allah, Who judges all His creation with perfect justice and holds everyone accountable for their deeds.! Deliver me from the companionship of my dreadful sins and make my grave spacious.

O Allah! Your mercy is my refuge, and Your Beloved (saw)Sallallāhu alayhi wa sallam (Peace and blessings be upon him), the Mercy to the Worlds, is my intercessor through Your mercy. I do not complain of You; rather, I complain to You of my nafsThe aspect of the soul associated with lower desires and negative traits. and of my condition.”

O my Generous Creator, O my Merciful Lord!

Your creature and servant named Said is rebellious, powerless, heedless, ignorant, sick, unworthy, sinful, aged, unjust, and a runaway slave. After forty years, he is filled with regret and longs to return to Your court.

He seeks refuge in Your mercy, confesses his countless sins and faults, and implores You for mercy while afflicted by doubts and all manner of spiritual maladies.

If, out of Your perfect mercy, You accept him, forgive him, and pardon him, that is most fitting for Your boundless mercy, for You are the Most Merciful.

But if You do not accept him, he knows not at whose door he should knock. What other door is there? Apart from You, there is no Lord to whom he may turn. Apart from You, there is nothing and no one worthy of worship in whom refuge may be sought.

لَا اِلٰهَ اِلَّا اَنْتَ وَحْدَكَ لَا شَرٖيكَ لَكَ اٰخِرُ الْكَلَامِ فِى الدُّنْيَا وَ اَوَّلُ الْكَلَامِ فِى الْاٰخِرَةِ وَ فِى الْقَبْرِThere is no god except You alone, without partner. May these be my last words in this world and my first words in the Hereafter and in the grave.

اَشْهَدُ اَنْ لَا اِلٰهَ اِلَّا اللّٰه وَ اَشْهَدُ اَنَّ مُحَمَّدًا رَسُولُ اللّٰهِ صَلَّى اللّٰهُ تَعَالٰى عَلَيْهِ وَ سَلَّمَI bear witness that there is no god except Allah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah. May Allah Most High bestow His blessings and peace upon him.